Category: <span>Confidence</span>

self sabotage help

How to Stop Self Sabotage

Self Sabotage – With Lisa Lapides Sawicki, Certified Life Coach

Have you ever set a realistic and attainable self improvement goal only to find your progress blocked before you ever achieved that goal?  If you find your answer is “yes” to that question, was the obstacle preventing your success within your control?  If so, you might be guilty of self sabotage.  When a person consciously or unconsciously hinders their own success through destructive words or behavior, that is called self sabotage.

We all have moments in our life where something doesn’t turn out as planned, but self sabotage occurs when we get in the way of our own progress.  There are many reasons why someone might unknowingly do this.  For example, fear of failure can be so overwhelming that it causes a person to quit before someone else sees them fail.  For others, the fear of success might be the cause.

Our Desired Goal

The thought of actually attaining that long desired goal creates a state of fear or anxiety because now they feel they might not be able to live up to those expectations.  There are many reasons why we get in the way of our own progress, but if you know it’s happening you can sometimes stop yourself from sabotaging your chances for success.

My guest today is certified Life Coach, Lisa Lapides Sawicki.  We speak with Lisa about what causes us to sabotage ourselves and more importantly how we can learn to overcome these self destructive impulses.

In This Episode You’ll Learn About Self Sabotage

  • What are some examples of self sabotage?
  • Can others sabotage you?
  • What is the “monkey mind”?
  • Can positive self talk help people overcome self sabotage?
  • Why do people break others down in their quest to succeed?
  • Has Lisa ever self sabotaged?
  • How habits can contribute to self sabotage.
  • How do people sabotage romantic relationships?
  • What is cognitive dissonance?
  • How do we learn to stop self sabotaging?
  • How do we live a more “normal” life?

Today’s Takeaway:

A fear of commitment, low self esteem, or feeling undeserving of happiness or success, are just some of the reasons why we deliberately sabotage ourselves.  If you’re always missing out on that dream job, or if that happy long term relationship is just out of reach, maybe it’s time to ask yourself, “Are you the obstacle?”  There is nothing shameful in admitting we might be sabotaging ourselves.  You may need help in overcoming these behaviors, but think of it as an opportunity to learn and grow so you can finally be happy to live the life you deserve every day.  Stop putting things off, stop procrastinating!  The future you dream of starts now.

Set a realistic and attainable goal for yourself and go after it!  Put together a road map outlining each of the steps along your journey to success.  Instead of taking actions that undermine your progress, hold yourself accountable by sharing your progress with your support team at every step of the journey.

Pulling it all Together

Celebrate every small victory and be proud of your accomplishments.  If you do that consistently and enjoy each small step daily, you’ll be well on your way to realizing your dream.  Remember, every day is a gift and the gift we get from changing our behavior to ensure that we accomplish our goals is a gift that will keep on giving.  You too can realize your dreams and build the life you’ve always dreamed of for yourself.

I’m Florine Mark and that’s “Today’s Takeaway.”

Quotes from the Self Sabotage Interview:

  • “Self sabotage is when we actively, or passively, or unconsciously, think thoughts and take actions, or no actions, that absolutely sabotage our success.” – Lisa
  • “For some people they really have regrets, big regrets, when they don’t account for something that they have continued to self sabotage their whole life.” – Lisa
  • “It’s not about the outside world; it’s working with who you are.” – Lisa
  • “The inner talk is our world.” – Lisa
  • “It all starts with the inner talk.” – Lisa
  • “It takes a really strong person to not fall prey to the criticisms and the judgements of other people.” – Lisa
  • “I can have the feast and the fun without the excess.” – Lisa
  • “Insecurity is why people will self sabotage a loving relationship.” – Lisa
  • “Make a custom design plan that’s doable for you.” – Lisa
  • “Mistakes are lessons to be learned.” – Lisa

To listen to the full episode click here ->https://888-3-florine.libsyn.com/how-to-stop-self-sabotaging

Related Links:

need life help

Need Life Help?

If you need I’m here to help!

My name is Lisa Sawicki and I am a certified Life Coach in San Diego, California. For years I’ve been helping people who need life help.

There’s a few things that I can tell you but the best thing to do is come in and let me help you unravel the issues that might be holding you back from the life you want. So here goes:
You must listen to what your soul, gut and feelings are telling you about:need life help
  1. You ( your current situations and results, inner thoughts, outer responses )
  2.  Other people ( all relationships including family)
  3.  What’s the healthiest and smartest way to interact with all your                        relationships..especially the most important ones (** Including YOU)
  4. What you are really a “NO” to and what you are really a “YES” to (so you don’t regret or resist something or someone you ‘signed up’ for)
  5.  Your flow of energy and your primary needs ( enough daily quality time to yourself for yourself, good sleep and nutrition, positive people , positive experiences….not too busy…pace yourself)
  6.  Take the time to intelligently and emotionally process your small and large decisions  seek expert advice when necessary…not friends)
  7.  Accept your decisions and when you have tried to do your best ( don’t allow yourself to keep 2nd guessing yourself once you’ve made your best decision…it will drive you crazy)
  8.  PAUSE before you speak to keep your composure and control…the best you can. Work on this and practice
  9.  Healthy Relationships = Healthy Boundaries…..Mandatory
  10.  Always : Self Aware, Self Love, Self Accept, Self Confidence , Self Compassion and Self Patience with Daily Self Coaching

This is conscience living.  If you need life help these are ‘the rules’.

From my heart to yours,

Lisa

Here are some other articles when you need life help:

Boating with a certified life coach

Is dating making your crazy?

 

San Diego Life Coach on the water

Beautiful Boating With Your Certified Life Coach

boating with certified life coachWow! Boating with a Certified Life Coach?

Slow Down….
Turn off…
Tune out….

TAKE INVENTORY OF YOUR LIFE!

2 hours on a beautiful boat with your certified life coach – get the details!

Spend 2 hours with Certified Coach, Lisa Sawicki on a beautiful boat in Mission Bay to effectively:

  • Get realistic clarity of your current life and your desired life
  • Learn the little step-by-step daily processes to get results
  • Create more confidence, resiliency, emotional health and positive inner strength
  • Gain greater ability to become more self aware
  • Learn ‘Daily Self Coaching” skills

Note: $75 per hour (2 hour minimum) and $50 per each additional hour through Sunset

Individuals, couples, families or groups, up to 5 persons. (Captain David runs the boat)

Why boating with a certified life coach?

It’s a proven fact that the human body contains 60% water. Life coaching on the water creates greater and faster results. Think about it… the water rocks us, it soothes us, it brings us back to our heart. That is where great work can be done to refocus, reframe, and re map your world. Take the plunge and take a cruise with Lisa Sawicki, a proven San Diego Life Coach!  The ship will be capably captained leaving your and Lisa the pleasure of time together dealing with the issues you want to deal with.

Call today and do some boating with a certified life coach!

(619) 722-5056

Life Coaching Really Works

Testimonials

Our session was phenomenally helpful yesterday.  Thank you so much.

I LOVED what you said yesterday which was … we have our own love language but what it the couples love language.  You really could have nice positioning on that.

You are a great coach. I love your directness, eloquence and the fact that you care.  I will refer business to you wherever I can.

************

Dear Lisa –

Thank you so much for your time, input and sincere help today. It really means the WORLD to me as I navigate these very new unchartered waters.

You are a GREAT coach.

Thank you,
Michelle

************

You are a very wise and compassionate person and a brilliant Coach! You are teaching me and guiding me to break patterns and strongholds in relationships and within my own mind/psyche that have been keeping me from living my divine purpose… This is a very exciting, yet challenging ongoing process of self actualization that is ” building my muscles” on all levels… It is so empowering to be working with you at this time in both of our lives! I feel that you are helping me to prepare for, as well as enjoy this glorious and exciting new decade we both are about to embark upon with courage, confidence, strength, enlightenment and joyous anticipation… I can’t wait to see and experience the miracles God has in store for us! I believe that ” God helps those who help themselves”, and I think we are both purposefully manifesting and designing the lifestyles and relationships we want and deserve by honoring ourselves and others, and doing so in a pure,
” emotionally clean” way. Wow! It just feels so good to have a kindred spirit in terms of our respective morals and values! You are an amazing human being and a consummate professional, and I respect and appreciate your wisdom, compassion, patience and talents more than you will ever know… Working with you is profoundly inspiring and life-affirming, as well as life-altering. It is truly an honor and a privilege to be working and growing with you, and I feel so blessed and excited to have you in my life!

Thank you so much, Lisa!
Christine

Need a great speaker for your next event?

Here are just a few of the topics I can speak about:

​1. You Need To Become Your Own Daily Life / Professional Coach
2. Healthy Boundaries Are Mandatory For Success
3. How Do Other People Perceive You? The Art of Becoming Self Aware
4. Managing Your Day More Effectively
5. How To Make Decisions Wisely and Promptly
6. How To Say “NO” With Grace and Confidence
7. How To Handle Adult Bullies
8. Save Your Precious Energy For What Really Matters…Stop Wasting Your Time!
9. Be The Director of Your Time..Your Time is Priceless
10. The Art of High Level Communication.. where Everyone Wins
11. Design Your Best Life.. Stop “Winging It”
12. Resiliency and Acceptance Will Add Valuable Years to Your Life
13. What Is Your Stress Assessment? Taking An Honest Look
14. Your Energy Bank and How To Effectively Invest In It
15. Ending Your Cycle of Shame and Start Living
16. Your Inner Thoughts, Interpretations and Actions Create Your World
17. The Comparison Trap

Families and Youth  Topics:

1. Creating A Good Vibe in the Home
2. How To Listen to Ourselves and Others…Fairly and Effectively
3. What it Means to “Do Your Part” …acting responsibly
4. What is Workability?
5. How To Get Along With Family Members
6. Eliminating The Resentment “Flu”
7. The Differences between Love, Romance, and Sexuality
8. Resiliency and Acceptance + Emotional survival
9. Is There a Bully in the Family?
10. The Comparison Trap
Life Coaching can help you

Stop Winging It! Life Coaching Can Help!

Have you ever wondered if life coaching could work for you?

Life coaching is a process that takes you from where you are to where you want to be.  I work with you hand in hand to foster and develop the desired goals you want to achieve.

A 6 week series of life coaching sessions can assist you with:

  • Scheduling a balanced day
  • Healthy boundaries with self and others.
  • Handling difficult or unreasonable people
  • Learning emotional resiliency
  • Learning to not take things personally
  • Figuring out what is important
  • Prioritizing those things in your life
  • Creating do-able “step-by-step” strategies for large and small goals
  • Creating ‘next’ action steps

Call or email me for a personal or group session.  I can meet you in person or via Skype, whatever works best for you.

I also teach you how to maintain the advancements you’ve created by showing you self help skills.  You won’t need me anymore because you’ll have the tools you’ve learned in your life coaching classes to continue forward.

I look forward to hearing from you,

Lisa Sawicki
Life Coach, San Diego, CA

email or
Call me at 619-722-5056

 

 

Excerpt from Dr. Kim Aikens Article

meditation-workExcerpt from Dr. Kim Aikens article “Mindfulness Goes to Work” April 2015

As everyone knows, the workplace can be a distracted, highly paced, multitasking world in which we are rarely aware of how our minds actually work or the stories we tell ourselves on a moment-to-moment basis.  Mindfulness is a form of focused mental training where we learn to pay attention to immediate experience rather than being distracted by what went on in the past or what we need to do in the future. It also encourages acceptance of that experience – a form of nonjudgmental awareness — that promotes openness and objectivity. This can result in
the development of resiliency and stress hardiness.

The fact is stress is often not so much about an event itself, but about what we are telling ourselves about that event. Research on stress clearly shows that too much pressure can adversely impact performance.  Say for example, you walk into your office and see a stack of work that is so mountainous papers have cascaded off your desk and onto the floor. If your mental chatter goes something like “This is overwhelming. I’m never going to get home tonight. I have to get all this done today!” it is likely you will show a significant stress response, complete with increased heart
rate and abdominal butterflies. The upshot is likely to be poorer performance and decreased work efficiency. However, if your internalchatter is more along the lines of “This is really a lot of work. I probably can’t get this all done, but I’ll do what I can and that’s OK”, you are likely to stay focused, relaxed, and will perform better.
In reality, we are rarely aware of our mental chatter and what it does to us. If you are not convinced, try a simple exercise. Set a timer for the next five minutes and simply count to ten. When you get to ten, go back
to one and start again. Is it easy to stay on task or do you get distracted?

Stay curious and watch where your mind takes you. It is likely you will be surprised at how difficult this simple exercise can be. Focused mindfulness training results in greater awareness of this constant internal dialogue
and provides concrete tools for the development of increased mental fitness, focus, and wellbeing.

Kim Aikens

Dr. Kim Aikens is an internist with a fellowship in Integrative Medicine from the University of Arizona. Inspired by the mind/body aspect of her studies, Dr. Aikens continued her education with certification training in
Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) at the University of Massachusetts. Dr. Aikens founded The Aikens Approach in order to bring mindfulness, resiliency, and leadership training to corporations. She also
has an MBA from the Ross School of Business at the University of Michigan as well as training in executive and leadership coaching from the University of Miami.

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self sabotage help

How to Stop Self Sabotage

Self Sabotage – With Lisa Lapides Sawicki, Certified Life Coach Have you ever set a realistic and attainable self improvement …