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dating a narcissist

Dating a Narcissist?

Narcissists can be very difficult to spot. Over time, they learn how to optimally manipulate their victims, and get by with their schemes without anyone questioning them.

What makes it even more confusing is that they don’t all act the same way. Certain patterns of behavior are consistent, such as when they idealize, devalue, then discard their romantic partners. But there are actually three distinct types of narcissists who act very differently on the outside, according to therapist Elinor Greenberg.

One of the toughest sub-types to spot is the covert narcissist, because they blend into the background much of the time. They aren’t a cliché of a grandiose, self-obsessed, “look at me” narcissist, Greenberg said. Instead, they are quietly cruel and behave in a much more passive-aggressive way.

For example, they may appear calm and professional to most people. But to those they are in a relationship with they are demeaning, cold, and abusive, and they can switch between these Jekyll and Hyde characters with ease.

People with dark triad personalities thrive off other people’s chaos, so a common game of theirs is to set their romantic partners up for failure all the time, then punish them for doing so. Sometimes they make empty promises, then get a kick out of the reaction when they don’t deliver. So if you’re dating a narcissist, keep that in mind.

“They do what they want to do when they want to do it,” said Shannon Thomas, a licensed clinical social worker who wrote the book “Healing from Hidden Abuse.” “And then they make themselves look like the victim.”

What Else Happens When You are Dating a Narcissist?

Some people who are dating a narcissist notice that they even deny making promises in the first place. In addition, they you’ll find them gaslighting their partner into think they are losing their mind. Over time, the victim may completely lose touch with reality, known as perspecticide.

You may wonder why anyone would be in a relationship with a covert narcissist in the first place, and the answer is complicated. According to Perpetua Neo, a therapist and doctor of psychology, one reason is covert narcissists are highly skilled at sucking their victims in with sob stories. This, she said, is a very effective trap for people who are high in empathy.

“Think about it like the covert narcissist has wormed their way into your heart,” she said. “There tends to be a string of misfortune, like every single ex is a jerk, every single friend they have is unhealthy. Always ask yourself what kind of circle of friends this person has. If they have zero friends, that’s an alarm bell, because the whole world cannot be that unhealthy.” Again, keep these things in mind when dating a narcissist.

What Stories will the Narcissist Tell You?

Spinning tales about their abusive childhood, or their battles with addiction, leads highly empathetic people down a path where they start to feel sorry for the covert narcissist. Further down the line you’ll develop a sense of responsibility over them, Neo said, because you feel “tethered to their potential.”

“But this covert narcissist has no intention of changing their lives,” she said. “It’s all a way of sucking you in and a way of getting attention, and a way of justifying their s****y behavior towards you.”

Dating a Narcissist
(Getty Images)

A Narcissist Will Manipulate Your Empathy

The problem is, whether the covert narcissist is a colleague, friend, or partner, if you are their chosen victim, you will already know about their alleged problems. And often they can be hard to ignore. Some even claim they are suicidal, meaning walking away feels essentially impossible for the victim.

“This will be a way to condition you into a sense of fear and walking on egg shells around them, so next time you are not going to hold them accountable,” Neo said. “They may even say this very common statement: ‘I’ve never felt this way about someone before.'”

This, again, gives you this responsibility to take care of them, even to the point you allow them to isolate you from your other friends and family.

With a covert narcissist, their emotions are paramount, but the victim’s needs and feelings are up for debate, Neo said. Everything is a competition, and nothing that happens to you even comes close to what they’ve been through, they say.

They will also never apologize, Neo said. They’ll simply give their victim the silent treatment as punishment until they give up and surrender.

A Narcissist’s Lies are Sophisticated

Essentially, covert narcissists have a high contempt for others, and anything that threatens their superiority is taken as a direct attack, Neo said. That’s why they are so hung up on being superior and looking down on everyone else.

“People who are above them in any way, in terms of their assets, or their career potential, or their talent, it’ll be ‘privilege,’ or the government’s fault,” Neo said. “Everyone else is just a rich w****r. They had rich parents. There’s always a way of blaming another person. And someone’s fortunes or talents are attributed to something external from them.”

They may appear to root for the underdog, but it’s just a way of making them look better, Neo said. By supporting liberal parties, or defining themselves as a feminist, they essentially trick people into thinking they have morals, when really their integrity is in the gutter.

They commonly tell other lies about their past, like beautiful or famous people they have slept with, or amazing job opportunities they’ve turned down. It’s all lies, Neo said. She added that covert narcissists tend to watch a lot of television because they are trying to mimic behaviors they see, such as empathy (which they are incapable of.)

Escaping a Narcissist

Escaping the clutches of a covert narcissist is hard because they drain their victims of energy and resources until they find a new target. Thomas calls it an “IV drip of poison” that doesn’t stop until they move on.

It’s not until the covert narcissist is gone that the victim finally realizes what they were going through wasn’t normal. But hopefully they do, and then they can start the process of healing, realizing it wasn’t their fault, and putting healthy boundaries in place to never be a covert narcissist’s resource again.

Covert narcissists are conflicted

It may stem from covert narcissists wanting to be worshipped. Greenberg said they are conflicted because they think a lot of themselves, but are also incredibly insecure.

“A closet narcissist doesn’t say, ‘I am special,'” she said. “They point to something else — a person, a religion, a book, a dress designer — and they are special, so they feel special by association.”

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process your feelings

How to Process your Feelings, Thoughts, and Actions Skillfully

I get a lot of questions about processing feelings. This is a deep question because much of it depends on the magnitude of those feelings. For example, if you’ve been exposed to your best friend dying versus a bad haircut, your feelings and the processing of your feelings will be handled differently. And yet, there is an ingrained way that we have all learned to process feelings.

Let’s remember that our thoughts are what happens 24/7 within your mind. Skillfully controlling those thoughts is what can lead to a stress-free, balanced, and happy life. Uncontrolled feelings can lead to no end of unhappiness. We may think our feeling control us but there is a part of us that can rise above feelings.

The Objective Mind is The Observer – Welcome This Guide!

Yes, we have a mind that is capable of achieving an objective viewpoint. What is an objective viewpoint? It’s the ability to pull yourself up from yourself and look down at your life, circumstances, and your feelings. It allows you to process your feelings in a way that can not be done if you believe you ARE your feelings. We are not our feelings, but SO much more.

Some people think this reflective thinking can only be done during meditation but it can be done anytime. We have a mind that is creative. So use your imagination and pull yourself up and out of those feelings. Look down on your life as if it belongs to someone else. Then assess the situation objectively.

Where Does it All Start?

Learning to process your feelings begins in your family of origin. Consequently, if you’re parents were mature and capable of talking through things that created strong feelings then you’ll have a much better chance of doing the same. If however, you are like most of us your parents lacked the maturity to some extent.

process your feelingsSo if you need help because your parents or guardians were lacking (which we all dealt with) try the following helpful hints to more successfully, and productively process your feelings.

  • Be an observer (use that objective mind)
  • Cultivate a realistic perspective
  • Write down all facts of a situation (if needed) , proof, add, delete it (if it is not a fact but only an assumption, judgement or just your interpretation)
  • Then, jot down all your feelings about the facts attached to this situation
  • Write down how any other person or persons (if pertinent) might interpret you and your actions regarding this situation… be honest with yourself right now without judgement
  • Do you know your desired outcome? What about anyone else’s desired outcome? Don’t assume you know what the other person wants.
  • Remain flexible and compromising. Honestly and fairly assess everything and everyone involved
  • If these feelings involve another person speak with them. Really listen to their side of the story. This usually clears up any misunderstandings.

In addition, here’s more advice to help you process your feelings:

  • Make an Emotionally Intelligent decision to accept something as is or to take productive and positive action.
  • Give yourself the smart flexibility to shift your plan based on what keeps being revealed what makes most sense.
  • Make fewer personal plans regarding other people. You’ll save yourself a lot of unhappiness and anxiety.
  • Create attainable, do-able action steps when problem solving, trying to reach new goals, or conquer projects.
  • Don’t unrealistically overload yourself with new tasks. Accept yourself too. If your action steps are too ambitious, unrealistic, and difficult it will only frustrate and sabotage your efforts. Don’t fall into this ditch.
  • Assess your process and the result outcomes….be flexible to “Tweak” when necessary
  • Use your mind creatively and with imagination.
  • See your life objectively so that the sting of life fades. We all deal with issues. It’s learning to deal with them that allows us to grow. Don’t wish your life was perfect, then you wouldn’t have the opportunity to deal with things that can help you mature.

Use all of these skills and more to positively transform parts of your life and relationships. You can learn to process your feelings and see the world anew! Be patient with yourself. Be kind to yourself. Begin with small do-able and realistic shifts and steps. Stay consistent and Never, Ever Give Up!

Always choose kindness towards yourself and others.

Need more help? Call Lisa Sawicki, Founder of Self Coach Now
Certified Life/ Relationship Coach
Offering Individual and Group Sessions
lisa@selfcoachnow.com
(619) 722-5056

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setting healthy boundaries

Setting Healthy Boundaries

Setting healthy boundaries means you place limits on what you will accept of another person’s words or actions. It is the foundation of a long and healthy relationship. Therefore, the best time to begin the practice of setting healthy boundaries is when you first meet.  Without healthy boundaries a terrific relationship is not possible.

Unfortunately, our culture and myths do not encourage this sort of open communication. It’s much easier to begin setting healthy boundaries at the beginning of a relationship. It is a form of training another person what you will allow. Eventually, once the relationship is on firm footing, those boundaries can become more flexible.

Setting healthy boundaries allows us to screen out unhealthy partners when we are dating. Individuals who have low self-esteem or a poor sense of identity are usually not able to respect others’ boundaries. If you say “No, I am not comfortable with that,” a healthy partner will respect that reply. An unhealthy partner will feel rejected by your “no” and take it as a challenge, and attempt to change your mind. Be aware of these things and protect yourself.

What are some examples of boundaries?

  • Material
  • Physical
  • Mental
  • Emotional

Fact: Healthy boundaries are to be used like fences to keep out things like:

  • Cruelty
  • Abuse – Bullying, physical, mental or emotional, embarrassment tactics
  • Harassment- can be camouflaged with humor or sarcasm
  • Toxic Manipulation – blackmail or threat of sharing a secret
  • Too needy – time waster
  • Too Intrusive with your privacy and time… always asking to join
  • Don’t have a life of their own and want to take over your life, your friends, children, parents, etc.
  • Entitled “I need and want this and you always come through for me” or “I need you to (unfairly) cover for me.
  • I did this for you now you owe me. ” I thought you were happy doing all my chores, cooking all our meals,
    paying for everything”

Then there’s those weirdly ‘nice’ behaviors that also show a lack of boundaries

  • Too “YOU” focused or obsessed
  • Overly generous with gifts or favors
  • A mean gossip behind your back and everyone else’s
  • Too competitive… where it becomes ‘mean spirited’

Then there are those very dangerous people to avoid who have no sense of boundaries – the narcissist

  • Narcissism – NPDs are grandiose, lack of empathy for other people, need to put down others to make them
    feel better about themselves, scanning for the negative or comparing you or your spouse or kids to others
    that they put on a pedestal only to make you feel much less then.
  • They have a huge need for admiration or envy. They can be Arrogant, Self-centered, Manipulative, Controlling and Demanding. Don’t be fooled! Because, they
    can start out charming, helpful,  complimentary and just when they know they have your trust, “WHACK”, they just hit you emotionally

Setting healthy boundaries is the key to a solid foundation in a relationship. Therefore, get help from a professional if you think you can’t set appropriate boundaries or don’t recognize what they are. You can do it! You will be thankful that you set up boundaries and then enforced them. Remember, start this at the BEGINNING of a relationship. You are actually training a person how you want to be treated! Don’t leave it up to them. A person will treat you just as poorly as you allow it.

For further help on setting healthy boundaries call a life coach in San Diego.

Lisa Sawicki is a seasoned life coach professional who has helped hundreds of people set and follow through with healthy boundaries.

Call today!  (619) 722-5056

In addition, if you are looking for a keynote speaker Lisa has a lot of interesting stories on the topic of boundaries. She relates the points in an extremely interesting and entertaining way. Call today to book her as a speaker for your group, club or organization.

emotional intelligence

4 Ways to Practice the Art of Emotional Intelligence

The art of emotional intelligence requires reflective thinking. You ask yourself “How am I coming off to the person in front of me?” Am I behaving in a way that is supportive of myself and that other? Think about behaving in a way that shows your sincerity and your humility. There’s simply not enough of that in the world today!

Let me give you some hints about how to practice the art of emotional intelligence.

  1. Self Awareness: Knowing what you feel and why and what are your strengths and areas you would like to improve on.
    Again, this takes some reflective thinking. Pull back on the reigns of your self. Slow down and listen to the things that come out of your mouth. Are they kind? Do you exhibit patience?
  2. Self Management: Use self awareness to get better at handling your impulses and your disruptive emotions. Actually STOP before you blurt out the same old reaction habits you always do. It will surprise those around you. Give it a chance and see if others don’t also change. Yes, I know… they should change first. Get off that thought and be the bigger person. You can only control yourself, no one else! This is the heart of emotional intelligence.
  3. Empathy:  Emotional intelligence is about sensing how other people feel and being able to read them accurately. Actually LISTEN to others without thinking about what you want to say next. Then pause and let them know you heard them. Show interest in what they say. The best gift you can give someone is the gift of your attention. Ask them questions about what they just said to you. BE AN ACTIVE LISTENER. Use your best intuition to feel the vibe and think what you or another person might need in this moment.
  4. Skillful Relationships:  Pay attention and focus on your needs and then blend that with what someone else needs. Our relationships are our most valuable life experience. Treat them with fairness, respect and care.
emotional intelligence
Image courtesy of Life Hack

Healthy and loving relationships develop with emotional intelligence when there is:

  • Trust – When another person knows they are safe with you they can be themselves. Give another human being that gift. Be trustworthy with their secrets and guard them like they were family.
  • A Feeling of Safety – Again, a person can heal when they feel safe. We all have emotional upsets that we need a friend to hear. Be that friend!
  • Real Listening Skills – Listen with the intent to HEAR not reply. Sometimes a compassionate witness is just ‘what the doctor ordered.’
  • Real Focus – Yes, this listening takes focus, concentration, and heart. You can do it!
  • Fairness and Respect – Always treat others the way you would want to be treated.

Communication Skills Awareness:

  • Verbal: What we say and how we say it.
    Watch your tone with others. Sometimes we are not aware that our tone can be hurtful. Avoid sarcasm. You may think it’s funny but it’s rarely helpful or needed.
  • Non-Verbal: What we communicate without words, through body language, tone of voice or our actions. 
    Yes, this is more difficult but try and become aware of how you carry yourself, your facial expressions, and your overall demeanor.
  • Listening Skills: How we interpret both the verbal and non-verbal messages sent by others.
    Stay clear with others by asking questions immediately if you think you heard something that offended you. 99% of the time it was not what the other person wanted to relay. Upsets can be easily overcome by getting things straightened out immediately

Above all have a sense of humor! People with high emotional intelligence have an excellent sense of humor and use it frequently to dispel all kinds of difficult situations. You can do it!

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emotional health

Emotional Health Will Transform Relationships

Creating Transformative Relationship with Self and Others

Learning the Skills you need for this “ART FORM”

by Lisa Sawicki

Those people with excellent emotional health are those who can control their emotions and behavior. In addition, those with emotional health will show resilience during troubling and challenging situations. Furthermore, people with emotional health can build strong and lasting relationships during their lifetime.  This desired state of emotional health requires:

  • knowledge
  • dedication
  • effort

A healthy emotional state doesn’t just happen.

So, let’s start by giving you some of the knowledge you need to achieve emotional health.

The Characteristics of Emotional Health

Emotional Health is steeped in positive characteristics, meaning that positive emotions are pertinent to achieving emotional health. Emotionally healthy people have a:

  • Sense of Contentment
  • Zest for Life
  • Ability to deal with Stress and Obstacles
  • Sense of Meaning and Purpose in Life
  • Flexibility to learn and adapt
  • Balance between Work, Play and ‘You’ time
  • Ability to Create and Maintain Relationships
  • Self Confidence
  • High Self Esteem

Emotional health is more than optimism. It is an authentic understanding of what truly makes us happy. Being emotionally healthy does not imply the absence of all negative emotions. In addition, it is not faking positive emotions when they are not genuinely felt.

Emotional health is reached when you learn to accept yourself with love, compassion and respect. Above all, it’s in those instances where you make mistakes, feel rejected, or encounter setbacks in your life where you can exercise that muscle that allows your emotional health to grow!

Think of emotional health as a workout

Embrace challenges. For example, see even little challenges as an opportunity to cultivate new reaction habits. Furthermore, surprise your family and friends with a new approach. Sometimes when we change others around us change too.

Above all practice emotional intelligence and be your own Life Coach throughout the day. Slow down and notice your behavior. This starts with three critical elements:

  • Identify when you feel yourself behaving in ways you’d like to change
  • Understand there is a different and improved way to handle things
  • Use your own emotions and your imagination to determine how you want to behave next time
  • Consider positive ways to relieve stress and anxiety. Things like exercise, meditation, and play are helpful in this regard.

Do you need a life coach? I can help! My name is Lisa Sawicki and I have devoted my life to helping others with their emotional health. Call me today for a free evaluation.

(619) 722-5056

Related Articles

Freedom Around Food

Feeling Freedom Around Food

Freedom Around FoodInterested in Feeling Freedom Around Food?

Most people have food restrictions and food allergies today even if it is the most common one of gaining weight.

That being said, an individual(s) inside a family should never be made to feel different or high maintenance. We all have learned that each one of us has to manage food lifestyle choices. No person escapes that for physical comfort and health.

It’s important to not feel like you’re just someone with diabetes. Understand we are ‘all on the same playing field’. We all need to make eating a healthy and desirable experience. Come at the issue from delicious ‘food abundance’ as opposed to ‘food deprivation’.

What are some of the things you can do to gain freedom around food?

  • Use of color, textures, tastes, presentation, herbs, spices and variety
  • Think about food as the ‘Gift of Nourishment and the Gift of Eating’
  • Keep your food looking fresh, organized, and easy to see and get to from your refrigerator.
  • Plan great meals ahead of time and enjoy the process of that preparation
  • Know the restaurants that work well for everyone with all their various food needs.
  • Make all of this a priority and a real food art project. Make it fun and embracing.
  • Create some easy and healthy ‘go to’ snacks when you have zero energy or time to create a meal.
  • Have in-stock the foods you love ready to go in your refrigerator and your car

Star your new food / ‘eating art 4 life ‘ project right now. Make time to think and prepare. Embrace it with creativity, insight and passion. We have to eat…smart. Just like anything else we have to do things to obtain our best results. Consequently, if we have to eat smart then I say let it be enjoyable and delicious!

It is incredibly worth the overall healthy results and good, freeing feelings. Here is another article you can read about freedom from food.

If you have other questions about food, dieting, or just getting your skills around food dialed in call me! So, I’m happy to meet with you in person and give you even more life skills about this very important matter.

~Lisa Sawicki

(619) 722-5056

need life help

Need Life Help?

If you need I’m here to help!

My name is Lisa Sawicki and I am a certified Life Coach in San Diego, California. For years I’ve been helping people who need life help.

There’s a few things that I can tell you but the best thing to do is come in and let me help you unravel the issues that might be holding you back from the life you want. So here goes:
You must listen to what your soul, gut and feelings are telling you about:need life help
  1. You ( your current situations and results, inner thoughts, outer responses )
  2.  Other people ( all relationships including family)
  3.  What’s the healthiest and smartest way to interact with all your                        relationships..especially the most important ones (** Including YOU)
  4. What you are really a “NO” to and what you are really a “YES” to (so you don’t regret or resist something or someone you ‘signed up’ for)
  5.  Your flow of energy and your primary needs ( enough daily quality time to yourself for yourself, good sleep and nutrition, positive people , positive experiences….not too busy…pace yourself)
  6.  Take the time to intelligently and emotionally process your small and large decisions  seek expert advice when necessary…not friends)
  7.  Accept your decisions and when you have tried to do your best ( don’t allow yourself to keep 2nd guessing yourself once you’ve made your best decision…it will drive you crazy)
  8.  PAUSE before you speak to keep your composure and control…the best you can. Work on this and practice
  9.  Healthy Relationships = Healthy Boundaries…..Mandatory
  10.  Always : Self Aware, Self Love, Self Accept, Self Confidence , Self Compassion and Self Patience with Daily Self Coaching

This is conscience living.  If you need life help these are ‘the rules’.

From my heart to yours,

Lisa

Here are some other articles when you need life help:

Boating with a certified life coach

Is dating making your crazy?

 

San Diego Life Coach on the water

Beautiful Boating With Your Certified Life Coach

boating with certified life coachWow! Boating with a Certified Life Coach?

Slow Down….
Turn off…
Tune out….

TAKE INVENTORY OF YOUR LIFE!

2 hours on a beautiful boat with your certified life coach – get the details!

Spend 2 hours with Certified Coach, Lisa Sawicki on a beautiful boat in Mission Bay to effectively:

  • Get realistic clarity of your current life and your desired life
  • Learn the little step-by-step daily processes to get results
  • Create more confidence, resiliency, emotional health and positive inner strength
  • Gain greater ability to become more self aware
  • Learn ‘Daily Self Coaching” skills

Note: $75 per hour (2 hour minimum) and $50 per each additional hour through Sunset

Individuals, couples, families or groups, up to 5 persons. (Captain David runs the boat)

Why boating with a certified life coach?

It’s a proven fact that the human body contains 60% water. Life coaching on the water creates greater and faster results. Think about it… the water rocks us, it soothes us, it brings us back to our heart. That is where great work can be done to refocus, reframe, and re map your world. Take the plunge and take a cruise with Lisa Sawicki, a proven San Diego Life Coach!  The ship will be capably captained leaving your and Lisa the pleasure of time together dealing with the issues you want to deal with.

Call today and do some boating with a certified life coach!

(619) 722-5056

Dating tips San Diego

Is Dating Making You Crazy? Dating Tips San Diego

Interested in dating tips San Diego?
Can you relate to these typical dating issues:

  • Social anxiety or shyness, and very little experience with dating?
  • Experience with dating, but afraid of rejection?
  • Starting over after divorce or the end of a relationship, and confused over how to start dating again?
  • Experience with dating, but not connecting with the right people?

These issues can be solved. As a trained San Diego Life Coach, I have years of experience helping my clients reach out and achieve the relationship they have longed for! I can help you discover the importance of first impressions, insecurities, and critical judgements. You can get past these things with the proper life coaching.

How can I meet the right person and keep them? If you’re a San Diego single let me help you with:

  • How to be successful at dating and finding who’s right for you.
  • Becoming confident and sociable and not intimidated by people you’re interested in.
  • Breaking the cycle of attracting the wrong people over and over.
  • Figuring out how to steer clear of people who aren’t good for you.
  • Keeping that special someone in your life once you do find them.

In addition, when relationships do not go the way you want and you face having to reject someone or the very worst … getting rejected, these issues can be handled with grace and ease. Learn how!

Dating can feel so very scary and vulnerable. I know. I have been there. Here are some more dating tips San Diego.

Here are some dating tips San Diego singles to make it much easier:

  1. Always be your most confident, and classiest self. You must always be proud of your behavior.
  2. Try to set a tone where you and your date feel comfortable. This is so important even if you feel you have nothing much in common. Try your best to connect easily for the time you spend together. It’s just a date, not a commitment.
  3. Remember a date is a ” play date” not an interview or a debate. Your dating goal is to try to have an enjoyable time. Don’t make it so serious. If it’s meant to be, your date will turn into a romantic relationship naturally.
  4. If you can, try not to personalize it and feel discouraged if your date or new relationship doesn’t work out. I know from experience how challenging that can be.
  5. Find out some basic information:
    • Are they available to you or not?
    • Can you see the future you want with this person?
    • Do you share similar values?
    • Are you attracted to him/her?
  6.  If these basic questions are not answered positively you can move on to other dating prospects that will be more suitable for you. It might take a little time if your heart was really invested . However, that’s ok… always nurture and care for yourself… no matter what happens to you. You owe that to yourself and deserve that!

Check back for more dating tips San Diego!

Contact a great life coach in San Diego and change your life!

Lisa Sawicki

(619) 722-5056

Self Coach

WHY WE NEED TO DAILY ‘SELF COACH’

Trouble Getting Through Your Days? Maybe Self Coach Methods are the ANSWER!

self coachYou’re not alone! Life can seem like a struggle. Remember:

  1. Life and living well can be challenging. You have the ability to self coach yourself to a better life.
  2. Relationships vary and so does the skill set to maintain and grow them.

We all strive for peacefulness, love, passion, joy, accomplishment, being present, high self-esteem, being open and adaptable, excitement and feeling lovable. Because life and relationships can be very challenging, we can sometimes or often feel upset, hurt, rejection, loneliness, anger, resentment, fear and pressure. Those very feelings cause extremely harmful stress to our emotions and physical body and will cause depression and feelings of being ‘shut down’.

At San Diego Life Coach we can show you how to be in charge of not only your direction, but your life! You are the one called to parent your self. Don’t believe the world view that says hardships should be avoided. Look to hardship and challenges to use as a springboard towards growth and self-mastery. We all have the ability to gain a positive focus.

No one ever teaches you how to properly Coach Yourself for this journey called “LIFE”.

So many people just keep reacting and “Winging it”.

However, there is a do-able solution to this:

*Fact: We are actually coaching and directing ourselves in each area of our life about 16 waking hours a day whether we are doing it productively, unproductively or even destructively..    We want to live a fulfilling life worth living.

Because your life is important and matters deeply to you, you must start NOW to consciously, emotionally and healthily “Daily Self-Coach”. It’s fun, it’s easy and I can teach you how to do it for yourself!

  1. Start taking Control of Your Life by learning self coach techniques
  2. Learn “Daily Self Coaching Skills” NOW

For a free 1/2 hour introductory session call Lisa Sawicki, Certified Life Coach

619-722-5056

dating a narcissist

Dating a Narcissist?

Narcissists can be very difficult to spot. Over time, they learn how to optimally manipulate their victims, and get by with …

process your feelings

How to Process your Feelings, Thoughts, and Actions Skillfully

I get a lot of questions about processing feelings. This is a deep question because much of it depends on the magnitude of …

setting healthy boundaries

Setting Healthy Boundaries

Setting healthy boundaries means you place limits on what you will accept of another person’s words or actions. It …