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what is wrong with my relationship

What is wrong with my relationship?

The Art of Communication, Dating, and Relationships

Are you wondering “what is wrong with my relationship?” Coaching has taught me that many people seem to “wing” their relationships – professional and personal. What I notice is that people don’t always regularly offer consistent and mindful attention to their relationships – instead they react to them. For this reason, effective communication and listening skills are paramount to the development of every successful relationship. Learning how to navigate the dating scene and relationships can be a challenge, but the rewards are exciting, fulfilling and often times – lasting. I’m excited to work with you on your journey!

What are the basics in a relationship?

  • What are the ingredients of a healthy and happy relationship?
  • What is the difference between a bad relationship and a painful relationship?
  • Are all painful relationships bad?
  • What are our beliefs about the challenges we face in relationships? Do we endure them? Do we reason? Do we excuse? Do we look for solution? Do we work together?
  • How do you promote a healthy relationship? What does this look like?
  • What are you willing to put into your relationship, what do you want out of it, and where and when do you need to meet someone in the middle?
  • What are healthy boundaries? What do they look like? How are they formed and enforced?
  • Where does your responsibility in a relationship end and the other person’s begins?

Defining the relationship

Clearly not all relationships are the same, nor do they carry the same weight. These questions are meant for those of you who are curious, dating, ten years into marriage, and for those of you who want to understand the nature of relationships and your role within each one. Because of this, my website is an invitation to those of you who are interested in learning the skills that will enable you to work and contribute productively in your personal and business relationships.

Other questions I will address include:

  • What does toxicity in a relationship look like and how do you separate it from the rest of the relationship?
  • How do you identify toxicity and its origins?
  • How do you break free from toxic cycles?
  • How do you learn to become of aware of a tendency to blame rather than take responsibility for your role?
  • What is your agenda within the relationship?
  • Are you interested in being right or are you interested in finding middle ground (see agenda)?

I don’t want to get hurt by love

Pain is inevitable within our important relationships; specifically, in friendships, loving and familial relationships. Therefore it’s the people we love the most that are the ones who can hurt us the most and vice versa. So how do we effectively communicate with our loved ones and others in a way that will bring about the most productive and authentic outcome?

Relationships are challenging because communication is challenging. For example, have you ever heard someone say “That’s not what I meant”? Have you ever said it? Have you ever felt confused about how to accurately communicate what you’re thinking or feeling? Or kept quiet because you didn’t know how to say what you wanted to say?

Learn how to say what you mean and get clear if you’re misunderstood

Effective communication within a relationship requires skills. And different relationships require different skills. Communication with your boss is different than it is with your partner. You will not communicate the same way with the cashier at your grocery store as you do with your clergymen. Same thing when it comes to say your students vs your children.

Successful relationships are built on effective communication, healthy boundaries and mindfulness. These attributes stem from the relationship an individual has with Self. And as part of my introductory offer, a 45-minute phone consultation and a one-page outline on Daily Self Coaching is yours at no cost.

Do I really need to work at my relationships?

Relationships are a creation made by the people that comprise them. In this light they can be compared to anything living. And like the people within the relationship, relationships can be either healthy or unhealthy. If the people involved are interested in the longevity and health of the relationship – it must be tended to. We will discuss how to do this in your coaching sessions.

Understanding our motivations within a relationship is an important step toward the development of a successful relationship. So, successful relationships require awareness, attention and patience by everyone involved. This requires an awareness of applicable tools – specifically effective communication.

In your coaching sessions you will learn:

  • How to set healthy boundaries
  • The difference between listening and hearing
  • The difference between speaking in person and communicating online or through text (not advisable!)
  • Conflict resolution skills
  • The art of compromise
  • Prioritizing relationship energy
  • Relationship energy transference
  • The art of authenticity and honesty
  • The definitions and examples of codependency and enabling behaviors
  • A basic understanding of common personality disorders
  • The art of “Backing Off”
  • The art of confrontation
  • Self-love and Self trust

Phone, FaceTime or Skype Sessions include:

  1. Individual Sessions
  2. Group Sessions
  3. Conference Calls
  4. Eight Week or 16 Hour Workshops – Email for details.
  5. Speaking Engagements

About Me

I received my coaching certification from Dale Carnegie Management and Leadership Training in 1994. My clients are everyday people from every walk of life. I will coach you in effective communication and listening skills, the art of successful dating, becoming mindful and how to create healthy relationships using healthy boundaries.

Lisa Sawicki ~ CPPC, CLC, LPCC, IDCA
Certified Executive Life Coach
619.722.5056
www.facebook.com/lifecoachinsandiego

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